Stop (complaining)! The Love You Save May Be Your Own
Hello Zennies! Today we want to talk to you about the impact of incessant complaining in a relationship. Now please be certain, we are not talking about your bringing legitimate issues to partner’s attention. We are talking about your complaining about your partner to such a degree that you are trying to transform them into a completely person. Below we have compiled a list of things you should never do if you want a happy relationship.
- Comparing your partner to another person. Aside from being rude, there is nothing as disrespectful as suggesting to your partner that they become more like somebody else.
- Complaining about your partner to your friends and family. This too is a big NO. What are you talking to other people about your partner for? What are they going to do? Unless you are disclosing abuse there is no good reason for to provide others with the inner workings of your relationship. If you want help, seek out a good therapist as that is the appropriate person for you to talk to about your relationship.
- Stop nagging. Constant complaining about anything will make your partner want to run in the opposite direction. They already know what you’re going to say because you say it all the time. And if you’re still complaining about it, guess what? Nobody’s listening. Your partner has stopped caring about your words.
- Stop trying to control your partner. You can offer insight; you can offer your opinion. But to have a healthy relationship, you should not view your partner as someone who must be managed, especially if they have expressed their discomfort with your doing so. Just back off and give your partner a little space. You’ll both be glad that you did.